Adulting School for Millennials: Mastering Life One Class at a Time

In an age where “adulting” can seem like a daunting task, a new institution is opening its doors to those in need of a crash course in the basics of being a grown-up. The Adulting School for Millennials promises to bridge the gap between knowing your favorite coffee shop’s Wi-Fi password by heart and understanding how to file taxes without breaking into a cold sweat.

Course Highlights:

1. Laundry 101: Beyond Febreze

Discover the mysteries behind those washing machine settings (no, they’re not just there for decoration), and learn why separating your whites and colors can be a metaphor for life.

2. The Art of Tax Evasion (Filing)

A playful nod to the less-than-thrilling task of tax filing, this course aims to demystify the process, offering tips on getting the most out of your return without landing on the IRS’s naughty list.

3. Surviving Without Wi-Fi

In what’s described as a survivalist course for the digital age, students will learn the ancient art of offline entertainment and the lost skill of not panicking when the router needs a reset.

4. Budgeting: Not Just a Buzzword

Tailored for those who think ‘budget’ is just a car rental service, this course covers the basics of financial planning, including how not to blow your paycheck on avocado toast and artisanal coffee.

5. Emotional Intelligence: Reading the Room Beyond Texts

With a focus on face-to-face interactions, this class teaches the subtle art of reading social cues, empathy, and how to have a conversation without emojis.

6. Culinary Basics: Beyond Instant Noodles

Step up your cooking game with lessons that go beyond microwaving instant noodles. Master the art of actually using your kitchen for cooking.

7. DIY Repairs: The Duct Tape Dilemma

Learn why duct tape, while a universal solution, might not be the best choice for every household repair, and delve into the basics of using tools for something other than assembling IKEA furniture.

8. Navigating Relationships in the Age of Social Media

A guide to maintaining healthy relationships, distinguishing between ‘followers’ and ‘friends,’ and understanding why ghosting might not be the best conflict resolution strategy.

9. Time Management: There’s More to Life Than Netflix Binges

Find out how to balance work, social life, and self-care without resorting to time-travel.

10. Self-Care for Skeptics: It’s Not Just Bubble Baths

Explore a holistic approach to self-care that transcends spa days and emphasizes mental health, physical well-being, and the occasional digital detox.

The Adulting School for Millennials is not just a series of courses; it’s a call to action for those looking to navigate the complexities of modern life with a sense of humor and a willingness to learn. “Because real life doesn’t have a cheat code,” reads the school’s motto, a reminder that while adulting can be challenging, it’s also entirely manageable – one class at a time.