US Decides Rape is Acceptable Military Action

The United States has found a new benchmark for moral flexibility, with its decision to continue funneling military aid to an Israeli Defense Forces (IDF) unit known for its questionable extracurricular activities—most recently starring in a viral video showcasing a gang rape of a Palestinian detainee. In a move that will no doubt be heralded by future historians as a masterclass in cognitive dissonance, the US State Department, after “careful review,” has determined that these alleged atrocities have been “effectively remediated.” The lesson here? When the right parties commit heinous acts, a quick scrub and a new coat of PR paint can make them disappear from Washington’s moral radar.

Let’s break it down. The video in question shows members of the IDF’s Netzah Yehuda battalion committing sexual assault, employing a broomstick as their weapon of choice. The graphic nature of the footage prompted outrage—albeit more for the fact it leaked than for the act itself. The victim was left with severe injuries, including a ruptured bowel and broken ribs. But while some might see this as a clear-cut case of war crimes, others, particularly in the upper echelons of Israeli and American governments, saw it as more of a PR hiccup.

Now, for those keeping track at home, US laws ostensibly prohibit military aid to units involved in gross human rights violations. And by any reasonable standard, a recorded gang rape should tick all the boxes for such a definition. But these are not reasonable times, and so Washington engaged in a time-honored tradition: reinterpreting its own rules. According to a State Department spokesperson, new information provided by Israel showed that the situation had been “remedied,” thus allowing the continued flow of US dollars to the Netzah Yehuda battalion.

What kind of “remedy” was applied remains as mysterious as the Pentagon’s missing trillions. But perhaps it’s not so mysterious when you consider that the primary concern in Israel was not punishing the perpetrators, but rather identifying the whistleblowers who had the audacity to leak the video in the first place. Finance Minister Bezalel Smotrich, in an impressive display of moral gymnastics, demanded an investigation to root out those responsible for tarnishing Israel’s image by exposing the crime. Not to be outdone, National Security Minister Itamar Ben-Gvir hailed the accused soldiers as “our best heroes,” while some in the Israeli media lamented only that such acts were not yet official state policy.

Meanwhile, the US’s response might be summarized as a shrug, with perhaps a side glance at the potential diplomatic fallout. After all, Israel is a key ally, and in the grand scheme of things, what’s a bit of brutal sexual violence between friends? Certainly not worth losing a strategic foothold in the Middle East over. So, while human rights advocates cry foul, the US continues to arm the IDF, secure in the knowledge that when it comes to their allies, almost anything can be swept under the rug with the right bureaucratic finesse.

So, where does this leave us? Well, if you’re a member of the Netzah Yehuda battalion, it means you can carry on with your “duties” knowing that Uncle Sam has got your back. And if you’re the Palestinian community, or anyone who dares to believe in the sanctity of human rights, it means you’re once again reminded that those ideals are, at best, selectively applied. Because in the complicated dance of international politics, certain atrocities are simply too inconvenient to acknowledge, let alone punish.