Middle-Eastern Terrorist Arrives to Speak to Congress and White House
Polly TickleIn a baffling display of international relations, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, widely criticized and labeled a “Middle-Eastern terrorist” by…
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Police Implement ‘Shoot First, Ask Questions Later’ Policy for Calls from Black Neighborhoods
In an open acknowledgment of existing biases, police departments across the nation have started implementing a controversial new policy: “Shoot…
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Elon Musk Contributes $45 Million for Trump to Reduce Electric Car Numbers
Chip ByteleyIn a bewildering twist that seems to defy logic and history, Elon Musk has pledged $45 million to support Donald…
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IDF Applauded for ‘Zero Hostage Safety’ Policy in Latest Heroic Mission
In an audacious display of military innovation, the IDF has introduced its groundbreaking “Zero Hostage Safety” policy, a strategy hailed…
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Police Urge Citizens to Defend Themselves as Calling 911 Now Considered a High-Risk Activity
In a surprising and unsettling development, police departments nationwide have started advising citizens to think twice before calling 911, citing…
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Microsoft Suggests Scrapping Privacy Protections to Prevent Future Outages Like CrowdStrike
In a startling announcement, Microsoft has suggested that the recent CrowdStrike outage could have been avoided if only they had…
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