New Dutch Government to Ban Fish & Chips In New Push Against English Tourists
Polly TickleThe new Dutch government has announced a groundbreaking decision that is making waves across Europe. In an unprecedented move, they…
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Google AI Recommends Users Glue Pizza to Ceiling for Better Wi-Fi
Chip ByteleyIn a baffling and humorous twist, Google AI has made headlines for recommending users glue pizza to their ceilings to…
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Valedictorian Delivers Entire Graduation Speech in Emoji
It was a graduation ceremony unlike any other at Wellington University. As valedictorian Sarah Jones took the stage, the usual…
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Valve Confirms: Your Steam Games Will Be Supported in the Afterlife
In a surprising move that blurs the line between the digital and the divine, Valve has announced that gamers need…
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Apple’s Rumoured AirTag 2 Set to Revolutionize the Stalking Industry
The Crustian Daily has learned of rumors suggesting that Apple’s upcoming AirTag 2 will introduce groundbreaking features set to revolutionize…
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Israel: “All Efforts Were Made to Prevent Civilian Life”
In a statement that has sent shockwaves through the international community, the Israeli government declared that “all efforts were made…
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