US Announces New Foreign Policy: Sanctioning Anyone Who Tries to Hold Us Accountable
Polly TickleIn a bold and somewhat baffling move, the United States has unveiled a new foreign policy initiative: sanctioning any international…
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9 Years After Gay Marriage Passed, All Ireland Now Gay
In a development that has shocked absolutely no one, Ireland, nine years after legalizing gay marriage, has reportedly seen its…
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Scientists Announce Microplastics as the New Superfood: Part of Your Daily Detox!
Chip ByteleyIn an unprecedented turn of events, scientists have discovered the latest addition to the health food craze: microplastics. These tiny…
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Lindsey Graham Proposes Invasion of Netherlands: “ICC Can’t Arrest Us If We Own Them”
In a spectacular display of international diplomacy, Senator Lindsey Graham has proposed that the United States should invade the Netherlands…
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“Oh, Great”: Sarcasm to Debut as Olympic Sport in 2024, IOC Confirms
The International Olympic Committee (IOC) has officially announced the inclusion of Sarcasm as a competitive sport in the 2024 Olympics.…
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Fox News to Include ‘Trigger Alerts’ for Unfavorable Economic Forecasts
In a move that blurs the line between news reporting and emotional coddling, Fox News is set to roll out…
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