“I Fought the Lawn and the Lawn Won:” Local Man Wages Epic Battle Against Wildflowers
Chip ByteleyIn a tale that speaks of the futility of taming nature, a local man, known for his meticulously manicured lawn…
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Ukraine Resorts to Using Wooden Rifles and Smashed Binoculars in New Ground Defense Strategy
Polly TickleIn a response laced with as much irony as innovation, Ukraine has unveiled its latest ground defense strategy titled “Operation…
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MTG Caught in Plan of Sacrificing Intern to Elder Gods in Exchange for Middling Poll Results
In a shocking turn of events, Representative Marjorie Taylor Greene was embroiled in a scandal that sounds more like the…
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White House Installs Revolving Door to Accommodate Rapid Staff Turnover
In a tongue-in-cheek response to the unusually high rate of staff turnover, the White House has reportedly installed an actual…
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Uber to Launch New Service: UberHuman, Rent a Crowd for Any Occasion
Uber, that ubiquitous app known for delivering rides and takeout, is about to take a sharp turn into the realm…
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Study Finds Most Family Members Can Be Easily Replaced with Reasonably Priced Robots
In an eye-catching and somewhat humorous study that seems to blur the lines between sci-fi and suburban reality, researchers are…
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