Elon Musk Pledges to End Homelessness by Purchasing the Moon
Polly TickleIn a stunning announcement that left both astronomers and economists scratching their heads, tech magnate Elon Musk has declared his…
Read More
Legal Experts Baffled as Trump Attempts to Plead ‘Alternative Innocence’
In an unprecedented twist in courtroom strategy, former President Donald Trump has introduced a novel legal concept that has left…
Read More
Ben Gvir Announces Concept of Food Aid as a Hamas Ideal
In a twist that could vex even the most astute satirist, Israeli National Security Minister Itamar Ben Gvir’s latest proclamations…
Read More
Senate Introduces Bill to Make ‘Unfollowing’ Politicians on Social Media a Federal Offense
Chip ByteleyIn a daring leap towards what can only be described as “compulsory digital loyalty,” the U.S. Senate has unveiled legislation…
Read More
Neuralink Update Includes Mandatory Volunteer Signup for Mars Colonization
In a bold move that blurs the lines between cutting-edge technology and interplanetary draft, Elon Musk’s Neuralink has announced its…
Read More
Voting to be available via TikTok Polls in Bold Move to Increase Youth Turnout
In a bid to make democracy more “lit” and significantly boost youth voter turnout, authorities have announced a revolutionary new…
Read More