UK Explores Migrant Expulsions to Narnia
Polly TickleLONDON – In a move that would leave even C.S. Lewis scratching his head, the UK Home Office is reportedly…
Read MoreGaza’s Latest Truce Proposal Includes Bong Session Between Leaders, World Leaders Skeptical
In a bold move that has left the international community both perplexed and mildly amused, Gaza’s latest proposal for a…
Read MoreRishi Sunak Declares Democracy at Risk, Suggests British Tea Might Be the Solution
UK Prime Minister Rishi Sunak has declared democracy itself to be under siege. However, his proposed remedy to this existential…
Read MoreNational Spelling Bee Adds Emojis to Official Dictionary
In a revolutionary twist that’s setting the internet abuzz, the venerable Scripps National Spelling Bee has announced the latest addition…
Read MoreGaza to Be Renamed ‘Schrodinger’s City’: Simultaneously Exists and Doesn’t in International Policy
In a move that has baffled diplomats and physicists alike, Gaza is set to be renamed ‘Schrodinger’s City’, embodying its…
Read MoreIsrael’s Latest Strategy: Redecorating Gaza with Precision Airstrikes
The latest strategy out of the geopolitical playbook involves “redecorating” the Gaza Strip using precision airstrikes. This innovative approach aims…
Read MoreSouth China Sea Sees First Ever ‘Ship-Bumping’ Contest
In a move that’s as bewildering as it is buoyant, the Philippines and China have set their compasses toward a…
Read MoreNew Canadian Safety Law Requires Pedestrians to Wear Helmets
In a bold move that has safety experts nodding in helmets of approval and fashionistas recoiling in horror, Canada has…
Read MoreElon Musk Pledges to End Homelessness by Purchasing the Moon
In a stunning announcement that left both astronomers and economists scratching their heads, tech magnate Elon Musk has declared his…
Read MoreLegal Experts Baffled as Trump Attempts to Plead ‘Alternative Innocence’
In an unprecedented twist in courtroom strategy, former President Donald Trump has introduced a novel legal concept that has left…
Read MoreBen Gvir Announces Concept of Food Aid as a Hamas Ideal
In a twist that could vex even the most astute satirist, Israeli National Security Minister Itamar Ben Gvir’s latest proclamations…
Read More‘None of the Above’ Winning in Early Polls
In an unprecedented twist that has both political analysts and satirists rubbing their hands with glee, early polls across the…
Read More30,000 Dead, Israel Competing In ‘Olympics of Accusation’
In a perpetual tableau of sorrow, one that seems to loop endlessly across the timeline of recent history, the streets…
Read MoreSelective Memory Syndrome Strikes Global Leaders Following Iranian Retaliation
In what appears to be a sudden outbreak of Selective Memory Syndrome (SMS), world powers have conveniently forgotten recent provocations…
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Voting to be available via TikTok Polls in Bold Move to Increase Youth Turnout
In a bid to make democracy more “lit” and significantly boost youth voter turnout, authorities have announced a revolutionary new…
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