South African Immigrant Promises to Destroy Country
Polly TickleIn a shocking turn of events, Elon Musk, the South African-born billionaire, seems hell-bent on dismantling the very fabric of…
Read MoreIDF Kills Egyptian Soldier, Netanyahu Apologizes, Insists They Thought He Was a Gazan Citizen
In a tragic incident that has further strained regional relations, the Israeli Defense Force (IDF) mistakenly killed an Egyptian soldier…
Read MoreHow Wagner Makes French Troops Look Competent: A Masterclass in Mismanagement
In a move that has left international observers scratching their heads, the government of Mali decided to replace the French…
Read MoreArcheology Team Stumbles Upon Ancient Egyptian Fast Food Joint, Finding Perfectly Preserved Falafel
Chip ByteleyIn a remarkable twist of fate, the world of archaeology has been turned upside down, or perhaps we should say,…
Read MoreIrish Historian Discovers Evidence That the Pyramids Were Built by Spud Farmers on Holiday
CAIRO – A startling new discovery by Dr. Seamus O’Toole, an eccentric historian at Queen’s University Belfast, is poised to…
Read MoreKenyan Cops Pack for Haitian “Vacation”: UN’s Latest Anti-Gang Initiative Sparks New Fashion Trend in Body Armor Beachwear
The beaches of Haiti were just expecting the usual tide of tourists. Instead, they’re about to receive a surge of…
Read MoreEgypt Strikes $8 Billion Deal with IMF: Plans to Invest in Pyramid Schemes
Egypt has secured an $8 billion IMF bailout package and has hinted at a shockingly unconventional investment strategy: pyramid schemes.…
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