U.S. Surprised at Israel’s Long-Announced Rafah Offensive, Pauses Arms At Last
Polly TickleIn a stunning turn of events that could only surprise a Rip Van Winkle or a remarkably uninformed mole, the…
Read MoreIsraeli Leaders Deny Gaza Blockade’s Impact: ‘Hunger Isn’t a War Crime, It’s a Diet Plan’
In a controversial statement, Israeli leaders have downplayed the severity of the Gaza blockade, dismissing concerns over its impact on…
Read MoreDonald Trump’s Facial Tan Revealed to Be Cheesy Doritos Coating
Chip ByteleyIn what can only be described as a snackable revelation, sources close to former President Donald Trump have disclosed the…
Read MoreGaza’s Humanitarian Crisis ‘A Boon for International Aid Donations,’ Says Israel
In a controversial statement, Israeli officials have suggested that the ongoing humanitarian crisis in Gaza serves as a “boon for…
Read MoreWashington Warns ICC: ‘Justice Is a Privilege, Not a Right’
In a controversial move, the United States has warned the International Criminal Court (ICC) against its recent string of arrest…
Read MoreTel Aviv Unveils ‘Food for Freedom’ Program, Relies on Hunger to Foster Peace
In a controversial move, Israeli officials have launched a new program titled “Food for Freedom,” aiming to foster peace in…
Read MoreICC Considers Adding White House to Arrest List Amid ‘Interference Inquiries’
The International Criminal Court (ICC) is reportedly weighing the inclusion of the White House on its list of potential investigations,…
Read MoreIsrael Proposes New Blockade Strategy: ‘Make Gaza an Island of Desperation’
In a controversial move, Israel has unveiled a new blockade strategy aimed at turning Gaza into an “island of desperation,”…
Read MoreTrump Lawyers Create Emoji-Based Explainers to Explain Contempt of Court
Get ready for the legal world to get a whole lot more expressive—and perhaps a bit more perplexing! In response…
Read MoreDelayed Reaction: Uvalde’s Echo Spurs Police into Action… Against Progressive Protesters
In a move that stunned both protesters and police critics alike, law enforcement finally found its sense of urgency this…
Read MoreSWAT Team Spotted Booking Flights to Antarctica As McMurdo Station Protest Comes To Light
In a stunning development that has sent ripples through both the scientific and law enforcement communities, a team of riot…
Read MoreNetanyahu and Co. Might Be Safe from ICC for Now, Thanks to Washington’s Intervention
In an unprecedented display of geopolitical maneuvering, the United States administration has launched what insiders are calling “Operation Justice Jam,”…
Read MoreGovernments to Pump Air into Currency to Increase Value
Desperate Times, Desperate Measures? Governments Eye “Inflation Reversal” by Literally Inflating Currency In a move that seems ripped from a…
Read MoreNetanyahu Announces “New Security Threat”: Anyone Who Doesn’t Share His Latest Tweet
Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu has declared a “new security threat” to the nation: anyone who fails to share his…
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New Charity Aims to Raise Financial Aid for the Super Rich
In a heartwarming display of compassion that would make Scrooge blush, the nation’s wealthiest elite have launched a groundbreaking new…
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