AI’s Election Meddling Gets Upgrade: Now Capable of Running for Office Itself
Polly TickleIn an astonishing twist to the age-old tale of election meddling, Artificial Intelligences across the globe have received a software…
Read MoreMTG Proposes Ban on Balloons: “They’re Just Chinese Spy Unicorns in Disguise”
Washington D.C. – In a move that has left both party planners and national security experts bewildered, firebrand congresswoman Marjorie…
Read MoreRepublicans Mistakenly Believes “Deepfake” Politician Is a Refreshing Change from the Usual Liars
In an era where trust in political figures wanes and digital technology reaches unprecedented heights, a nation has found itself…
Read MoreCanada’s Timing Impeccable as Ever: Ceasing Arms Exports to Israel in a Masterclass of Procrastination
Chip ByteleyIn an unparalleled display of impeccable timing, Canada has finally decided to cease its arms exports to Israel, not in…
Read MoreIn a Twist of Fate, Uncle Sam Swaps Hats: From Roadblock to Peacemaker in Gaza”
In a move as predictable as a plot twist in a daytime soap opera, the United States, previously the lone…
Read MoreFar-Right Party Chega Floats Portugal Wall Idea, Aims To Keep Away Mexicans
Lisbon, Portugal – In a move that has left cartographers and geographers scratching their heads, Portugal’s far-right party, Chega, has…
Read MoreKenyan Cops Pack for Haitian “Vacation”: UN’s Latest Anti-Gang Initiative Sparks New Fashion Trend in Body Armor Beachwear
The beaches of Haiti were just expecting the usual tide of tourists. Instead, they’re about to receive a surge of…
Read MoreRussian Ambassador Too Much Innocent Death In Gaza, Even For Us
In a world where diplomatic subtleties are often lost in translation, the Russian Ambassador’s latest statement has sent shockwaves through…
Read MoreInternational Community Sends Putin Congratulations, Along with a Dictionary Definition of ‘Election
In an unprecedented display of global camaraderie—or perhaps, satire—the international community has come together to congratulate Vladimir Putin on his…
Read MoreRussia Introduces World’s First ‘Choose Your Own Adventure’ Election
In a bold move that has game theorists and political pundits alike scrambling for their textbooks, Russia has unveiled the…
Read MoreRussian Elections Announce New Breakthrough in Predictive Technology: Winners Declared Before Voting Begins
Russian officials have proudly announced a revolutionary breakthrough in predictive technology: the ability to declare election winners before the cumbersome…
Read MorePortugal’s Political Parties Consider Group Therapy After Election
Burnt Out and Bitter: Portuguese Politicians Seek Post-Election Counseling After a particularly grueling election cycle marked by mudslinging, social media…
Read MoreMexico’s Presidential Palace Door Knocked Down: Protesters Claim They Were Just Looking for the Bathroom
Mexico City awoke to a scene straight out of a slapstick comedy (or a particularly ill-planned coup attempt). The once-imposing…
Read MoreFor International Women’s Day, World Leaders Agree to Swap Roles with Women, Anticipate Global Improvement by Noon
for International Women’s Day world leaders have unanimously agreed to step aside and let women run the show. Expectations are…
Read MorePresident Biden Uses State of the Union to Unveil New Age-Defying Cream: Promises to Reduce National Debt and Wrinkles
In a history-making (or wrinkle-reducing?) address, President Biden addressed the nation last night, tackling two of America’s most pressing concerns:…
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