Santa Cancels Operations in Middle East as IDF Fails to Promise Safe Passage
Polly TickleIn an unprecedented move that has left children and parents across the Middle East devastated, Santa Claus has announced that…
Read MoreSupreme Court Set to Approve Elon Musk’s Purchase of the Country
In a development that seems both inevitable and absurd, the Supreme Court is reportedly poised to approve Elon Musk’s audacious…
Read MoreWill Ginger Cows Repair Irish-Israeli Relations?
In a move that has left diplomats and conspiracy theorists alike scratching their heads, Israel has announced that a herd…
Read MoreIsraeli HOA to Govern New Palestinian Leadership in Groundbreaking Initiative
Any newly-formed Palestinian leadership is expected to fall under the governance of an unlikely entity: an Israeli Homeowners’ Association (HOA).…
Read MoreOpinion: ‘The Best Part of Adult Friendships Is Pretending to Want to Meet Up Someday’
Liv N. LargeLet’s be honest for a moment: The best part of adult friendships isn’t the shared history, the inside jokes, or…
Read MoreVision Pro Just a Demo of Tim Cook’s ‘Cyborg’ Eye, According to Leak
Chip ByteleyIn a revelation that’s turning the tech world on its head, a leaked report suggests that Apple’s much-hyped Vision Pro…
Read MoreElon Musk and Donald Trump to Escape to Mars if Kamala Wins
The 2024 election could be the most consequential in history—literally out of this world, if the latest rumors are to…
Read MoreUS Military Stocks Up on Sticks and Stones in Preparation for WW4
In an unprecedented move that has left military analysts scratching their heads, the United States Army has announced it is…
Read MoreRussian Military Requests Aid from Irish Fishermen as Ukrainian Forces Threaten Crimea
In a bizarre twist to the ongoing conflict between Russia and Ukraine, the beleaguered Russian military has reportedly turned to…
Read MoreIsrael Successfully Converts Millions of Jews to Zionism
In a calculated move that has sent shockwaves through Jewish communities worldwide, Israel has effectively replaced traditional Judaism with a…
Read MoreWe Want a Ceasefire, Says Country Supplying the Bombs
Washington, D.C. — In a move that has left the world both confused and amused, the United States has issued…
Read MoreIsrael to Allow Journalists from North Sentinel Island into Gaza
In a move that has left the global journalism community both baffled and outraged, Israel has announced that it will…
Read MoreIsrael Expands West Bank Lebensraum Tactics to Target Christians
In a shocking escalation of its controversial policies, Israel has now set its sights on targeting Christian communities in the…
Read MoreRussia Applies to NATO for Defence Against Ukraine
Russia, a nation renowned for its military prowess and unparalleled ability to invade neighbors, has now found itself in a…
Read MorePutin Claims Kursk is “Historically Disputed” as Ukrainian Forces Advance
In a staggering twist of revisionist history, Vladimir Putin has now declared that the Kursk region, currently being overrun by…
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