Ireland to Repurpose Israeli Embassy to House Homeless
Polly TickleIn a surprising and symbolic gesture, the Irish government has announced plans to repurpose the soon-to-be-vacated Israeli Embassy building in…
Read MoreUSA and Russia Find Common Ground: Both Denounce ICC as “Inconvenient”
In a surreal twist of global politics, the United States and Russia have found themselves in rare agreement over a…
Read MoreIsrael Declares Hamas Leaders as Jewish in Response to ICC Arrest Warrants
In an unprecedented twist of irony and geopolitical theater, Israel has responded to the International Criminal Court’s (ICC) issuance of…
Read MoreUS Announces New Foreign Policy: Sanctioning Anyone Who Tries to Hold Us Accountable
In a bold and somewhat baffling move, the United States has unveiled a new foreign policy initiative: sanctioning any international…
Read MoreScientists Announce Microplastics as the New Superfood: Part of Your Daily Detox!
Chip ByteleyIn an unprecedented turn of events, scientists have discovered the latest addition to the health food craze: microplastics. These tiny…
Read MoreLindsey Graham Proposes Invasion of Netherlands: “ICC Can’t Arrest Us If We Own Them”
In a spectacular display of international diplomacy, Senator Lindsey Graham has proposed that the United States should invade the Netherlands…
Read More“Oh, Great”: Sarcasm to Debut as Olympic Sport in 2024, IOC Confirms
The International Olympic Committee (IOC) has officially announced the inclusion of Sarcasm as a competitive sport in the 2024 Olympics.…
Read MoreDublin-New York Omegle Experiment Reopens
After a hiatus marked by controversy and lewd behavior, the Dublin-New York portal has officially reopened, promising a renewed and…
Read MoreIsraeli PM Netanyahu Accuses ICC of Colluding with Hamas
Tel Aviv, Israel – In a dramatic escalation of rhetoric, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu has accused the International Criminal…
Read MoreIsraeli Officials Insist Fog Operated Independently, No Mossad Ties
Tel Aviv, Israel – In a press conference today, Israeli officials emphatically denied any involvement in the recent helicopter crash…
Read MoreShein Research Clothes That Dissolve in Rain to Boost Sales
Forget poor quality or questionable labor practices. The latest controversy surrounding fast fashion giant Shein takes a bizarrely self-destructive turn.…
Read MoreBritish Airways to Replace Boarding Passes with Facial Recognition Tattoos
British Airways is taking a futuristic and slightly unsettling approach to streamlining the boarding process. In a trial program that…
Read MoreGreg Abbott Announces Support for Terrorism
AUSTIN, Texas – In a surprising and controversial development, Texas Governor Greg Abbott has garnered widespread attention with a recent…
Read MoreUSA & Israel Celebrate “Freedom of Press Day” by Arresting Journalists and Shutting Down News Outlets
In a performance worthy of a standing ovation from George Orwell himself, today marked the nationwide spectacle of “Freedom of…
Read MoreBiden So Colorblind, He Fails to See His Own Red Lines
In an astonishing display of diplomatic colorblindness, President Joe Biden has managed to completely overlook his administration’s previously declared “red…
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