Liv N. Large
Polly Tickle
Chip Byteley
DominickIran Accused of Breaking ‘Unspoken Rules’ by Responding to Attacks
In the latest chapter of the Middle East saga, Iran’s recent retaliation against Israeli aggression has raised more than just…
Read MoreGlobal Leaders Agree: ‘Only Some Countries Get the Self-Defense Card’
In a stunning but unsurprising revelation, the international community has updated its unwritten rulebook, clearly delineating that the ‘self-defense’ argument…
Read MoreBoston Marathon Runners Now Required to Carry Sponsors on Their Backs for the Entire Race
The Boston Marathon, traditionally a test of human endurance and willpower, has jettisoned its esteemed history for a model that’s…
Read MoreWorld’s Billionaires Race to Escape Earth: ‘It’s Not You, It’s Us’
In an unfolding drama that feels more like a cosmic soap opera than reality, the world’s billionaires are in a…
Read MorePlants Feel Pain: The End of Vegetarianism As We Know It?
Crustian Satirical Daily News (CSDN) – In a revelation that has shaken the foundations of dietary ethics worldwide, a groundbreaking…
Read MoreBritain to Allow Toddlers to Lead Parliament in Attempt to Bring Maturity into House
Westminster, UK – In what’s being hailed as a bold step towards responsible governance, toddlers across the nation are being…
Read MoreIs Gaza’s Hospital Outage an Israeli Bid for a New Guinness World Record?
In a world where records are broken every day—from the longest pizza to the most people twerking simultaneously—rumors have emerged…
Read MoreIrish Weather Forecaster Apologizes for Surprise Sunshine, Promises Return to “Proper Gloom” Soon
“Sorry About That!” – Irish Weatherman Begs Forgiveness for Accidental Sunshine Dublin, Ireland – In a rare and somber address,…
Read MoreO.J. Simpson Loses Last Appeal as Cancer Pleads the Fifth
In an unscripted final act, O.J. Simpson, the once-glorified NFL star turned infamous defendant, has lost his last appeal in…
Read MoreBiden’s Balancing Act: Juggling Calls for Ceasefire with a $16 Billion Grenade
In an audacious blend of tragicomedy and technological farce, the world witnessed a “GPS Gone Wild” episode, as a high-tech…
Read MoreOne Town Too Many: The Curious Case of the 30,000th Straw That Broke Global Patience
Ottawa, Canberra, Wellington – CSDN: In a move that has political analysts scratching their heads and reaching for their abacuses,…
Read MoreMiracle Diet Pill Discovered: Simply Swallow Your Pride
Scientists have announced the discovery of a revolutionary new diet pill that promises significant weight loss with minimal effort. The…
Read MoreOverwhelmed ICJ Seeks Freelance Help
Amidst a surge in global tensions (and let’s face it, countries behaving badly), the hallowed halls of the International Court…
Read MoreThe Evolution of Dad Jokes: How They’re Shaping Our Internet
Dad jokes, those pun-laden quips once confined to family barbecues and the back seats of minivans, have undergone a remarkable…
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The Gaza Diet: IDF Praises benefits of eating grass
Touted as the cutting-edge in involuntary weight loss, the “Gaza Diet” emerges from the world’s most contested open-air locale, presenting…
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