The USA Switches Sides in War on Terror, as Netanyahu Declared Terrorist
Polly TickleIn a surprising twist that could have significant geopolitical ramifications, Pakistan has officially declared Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu a…
Read MoreIron Dome Takes Home Defense Too Literally, Strikes Israeli Cities
In a scenario that sounds more like a dark comedy than a military report, Israel’s Iron Dome defense system recently…
Read MoreSouth Korea Deadnamed at Olympic Games
Liv N. LargeIn a move that left the world wondering if Olympic organizers were playing a cruel joke or simply geographically challenged,…
Read MoreTrump Seen Shopping for Shrapnel-proof Vests
In what can only be described as a bold, albeit peculiar, move, former President Donald Trump was recently spotted shopping…
Read MoreMusk Declares Twitter Revenue Loss an ‘Intentional Strategy to Promote Anti-Consumerism’
Chip ByteleyIn a move that has left Wall Street analysts and Twitter users equally bewildered, Elon Musk announced that the platform’s…
Read MoreDutch Government Introduces Revolutionary Plan to Solve Housing Crisis by Redefining Cargo Bikes as Apartments
Amsterdam, Netherlands – In a move set to revolutionize urban living and possibly redefine the very concept of “home,” the…
Read MoreKamala Harris Aims to Overshadow Trump With WWE Debut
Vice President Kamala Harris has announced her intention to enter WWE, aiming to outshine former President Donald Trump’s infamous WWE…
Read MoreMiddle-Eastern Terrorist Arrives to Speak to Congress and White House
In a baffling display of international relations, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, widely criticized and labeled a “Middle-Eastern terrorist” by…
Read MorePolice Implement ‘Shoot First, Ask Questions Later’ Policy for Calls from Black Neighborhoods
In an open acknowledgment of existing biases, police departments across the nation have started implementing a controversial new policy: “Shoot…
Read MoreElon Musk Contributes $45 Million for Trump to Reduce Electric Car Numbers
In a bewildering twist that seems to defy logic and history, Elon Musk has pledged $45 million to support Donald…
Read MorePolice Urge Citizens to Defend Themselves as Calling 911 Now Considered a High-Risk Activity
In a surprising and unsettling development, police departments nationwide have started advising citizens to think twice before calling 911, citing…
Read MoreMicrosoft Suggests Scrapping Privacy Protections to Prevent Future Outages Like CrowdStrike
In a startling announcement, Microsoft has suggested that the recent CrowdStrike outage could have been avoided if only they had…
Read MoreGOP Launches ‘Old Lives Matter’ Campaign to Celebrate Trump’s Age
In a spectacular reversal that has left both critics and supporters bewildered, the GOP has unveiled its latest initiative: the…
Read MoreJoe Biden Drops Out of 2024 Election to Focus on Mumble Rap Career
In a stunning announcement that has left both the political and music worlds reeling, President Joe Biden has declared his…
Read MoreScientists Baffled as Y2K Arrives Two Decades Late
In a turn of events that feels ripped from a tech dystopia novel, the long-feared Y2K bug seems to have…
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