Tucker Carlson and Vladimir Putin’s Unexpected Sitcom Venture
Polly TickleThe surprising revelation that Tucker Carlson and Vladimir Putin are set to co-star in a sitcom has flipped the media…
Read MoreScientists Announce Breakthrough: A Coffee That Actually Makes Meetings Interesting
Chip ByteleyScientists have unveiled a mind-blowing breakthrough: a coffee that makes meetings actually interesting. Dubbed “Focus Fuel,” this revolutionary beverage boasts…
Read MoreStudy Reveals New Yorkers Spend 90% of Income on Rent, 10% on Complaining About It
NEW YORK – A groundbreaking economic study has revealed that New Yorkers have achieved an unparalleled level of financial efficiency.…
Read MoreFlorida Man Attempts to Sue Hurricane, Demands “Change of Venue”
“Your Honor, This Storm is Ruining My Vibe!” Florida Man’s Landmark Case to Stop Hurricane MIAMI, FL – In a…
Read MoreParents Praise Shrinkflation for Providing ‘Automatic Portion Control’ for Kids’ Snack Times
In a surprising twist to the tale of shrinkflation, a phenomenon that has seen consumers getting less product for their…
Read MoreUS Approves F-16 Fighter Jets Sale to Turkey: Erdogan Plans Air Show Over Greece
In a satirical twist on international military deals, the United States’ approval of F-16 fighter jet sales to Turkey has…
Read MoreICJ Orders Israel to Stop Acts of Genocide: Israel Asks for Definition of ‘Stop’
In the realm of international law, instances arise that illuminate not only the gravitas of legal discourse but also the…
Read MoreBig Pharma Announces Plans to Patent Air, Citing Years of R&D
Major pharmaceutical conglomerates, in a brazen show of corporate ambition, have announced together a plan to patent the very air…
Read MoreItaly’s Migrant Detention Centers To Be Transformed Into Spas
In a stunning and apparently ludicrous move that has raised skeptical eyebrows and spa robes throughout the world, the Italian…
Read MoreGrammar Police Announce New Task Force to Tackle the Misuse of Literally; Literally Everyone Worried
A ripple of dread has spread through the English-speaking world as the Grammar Police announced the formation of the “Special…
Read MoreA Sweet Dystopia: Lindt’s Easter Egg Apocalypse
Lindt, the vanguard of velvety chocolate indulgences, has issued a stark warning ahead of Easter: the bunnies might not make…
Read MoreUkraine Decorates Russian Oilfields with Decorative Drones
In what might be the most unexpected philanthropic move of the century, the Ukrainian Army has announced a groundbreaking initiative…
Read MoreThe Great Debate: Toppings or No Toppings? Yeaster Schism Divides the Church of Crustianity
Holy Pizza Wars! Yeaster Schism Threatens to Tear Church of Crustianity Apart A theological earthquake is rocking the Church of…
Read MoreEast Palestine Mayor Considers City Rename, ‘East Israel’ Seen As More Accurate
In a move that has sparked both controversy and curiosity, the Mayor of East Palestine, Ohio, is reportedly considering a…
Read MoreSunak’s Donor Drama: PM Proposes Donating £10M to ‘Racism Reversal Fund’
UK Prime Minister Rishi Sunak has unveiled a bold, albeit bewildering, initiative: the donation of £10 million to what he…
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