Exxonmobil Develops Plastic-Eating Fish to Save the Oceans
Chip ByteleyHouston, TX — In what the company is hailing as a revolutionary environmental breakthrough, ExxonMobil has announced the development of…
Read MoreScientists Confirm: Autism May Be Behind Most Vaccines
In a groundbreaking and somewhat ironic twist, researchers have announced that the driving force behind the development of most vaccines…
Read MoreElon Musk Contributes $45 Million for Trump to Reduce Electric Car Numbers
In a bewildering twist that seems to defy logic and history, Elon Musk has pledged $45 million to support Donald…
Read MoreElon Musk’s New Cloning Company Promises to Reintroduce Slavery
In a dystopian twist that feels ripped from the pages of a sci-fi horror story, Elon Musk has announced the…
Read MoreIsraeli Government Scientists Agree: Big Bang Happened on Oct 7, Universe Existed in Void Before Then
Polly TickleIn a revolutionary rethinking of cosmological events, Israeli government scientists have officially declared that the Big Bang occurred on October…
Read MoreStudy Finds 100% of Humans Addicted to Breathing, Efforts to Quit Prove Fatal
In a groundbreaking discovery sure to send the medical community reeling, a new study has determined that 100% of humans…
Read MoreHarvard Study Confirms: Harambe’s Death Behind Geopolitical Turmoil
In a shocking revelation, a recent study from Harvard University has concluded that the tragic death of Harambe, the beloved…
Read MoreShein Research Clothes That Dissolve in Rain to Boost Sales
Forget poor quality or questionable labor practices. The latest controversy surrounding fast fashion giant Shein takes a bizarrely self-destructive turn.…
Read MoreHas the USA Accidentally Creates Time Warp, Briefly Reverting to Extreme 1950s Politic Trends? This Scientist Thinks So
In a theory straight out of a sci-fi B-movie, an eccentric scientist claims the United States is experiencing a temporary…
Read MoreTeenagers Mysteriously Discover the Ability to Sleep Through ANY Level of Noise
In a development baffling parents, scientists, and sleep-deprived adults everywhere, teenagers across the globe have suddenly acquired the inexplicable ability…
Read MoreResearchers Discover That Cats Can See WiFi Signals
In a stunning revelation that’s sending shockwaves through both the tech and pet communities, researchers at the University of Silicon…
Read MoreScientists Announce Breakthrough: A Coffee That Actually Makes Meetings Interesting
Scientists have unveiled a mind-blowing breakthrough: a coffee that makes meetings actually interesting. Dubbed “Focus Fuel,” this revolutionary beverage boasts…
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Study Finds 9 out of 10 Americans Prefer Their Own Facts
A new study published in the esteemed journal “Not The Onion” has revealed a startling truth about the American public:…
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