Trump to Fans: ‘Get Over It’ Like It’s a School Shooting
Polly TickleIn a bewildering display of insensitivity, Donald Trump brushed off the recent shooting at his Pennsylvania rally, telling fans to…
Read MoreDonald Trump: America’s First King?
In a surreal twist that feels ripped from the pages of a dystopian novel, former President Donald Trump’s potential return…
Read MoreSupreme Court Approves Biden Plan to Murder Donald Trump
In a stunning turn of events that has sent shockwaves through the political landscape, the Supreme Court, in a decision…
Read MoreBiden Considers Border Wall in Push to Swing Republican Voters
In a strategic shift aimed at appealing to Republican voters, President Joe Biden is reportedly considering the resumption of border…
Read MoreTrump Foresees the End of Democracy: ‘If I Win, It’s Game Over, Folks’
In an ominous declaration that has sent ripples through the political spectrum, former President Donald Trump has made a bold…
Read MoreTrump NFTs Now Accepted as Legal Tender in Several Red States
In a move that blurs the lines between digital assets and real-world currency, several red states have announced that they…
Read MoreFlorida Criminal Still Plans to Run for White House
Despite being found guilty of 34 felony counts related to falsifying business records to cover up a hush money payment,…
Read MorePence Declines to Endorse Trump, Prefers Endorsing Literally Anything Else
In an unprecedented move that’s set political circles abuzz, former Vice President Mike Pence has openly declared his stance for…
Read MoreDonald Trump’s Facial Tan Revealed to Be Cheesy Doritos Coating
Chip ByteleyIn what can only be described as a snackable revelation, sources close to former President Donald Trump have disclosed the…
Read MoreTrump Lawyers Create Emoji-Based Explainers to Explain Contempt of Court
Get ready for the legal world to get a whole lot more expressive—and perhaps a bit more perplexing! In response…
Read MoreProsecutors Consider Using Reverse Psychology: ‘Please Don’t Confess, Mr. Trump’
In a novel approach that could only arise from the most surreal chapters of legal textbooks, prosecutors in the trial…
Read MoreTrump and Musk to Launch Joint Venture: Making Mars Great Again
Former U.S. President Donald Trump and billionaire space aficionado Elon Musk have announced a joint venture that is literally out…
Read MoreLegal Experts Baffled as Trump Attempts to Plead ‘Alternative Innocence’
In an unprecedented twist in courtroom strategy, former President Donald Trump has introduced a novel legal concept that has left…
Read More‘None of the Above’ Winning in Early Polls
In an unprecedented twist that has both political analysts and satirists rubbing their hands with glee, early polls across the…
Read More‘The Art of the Deal’ 5 Tips Trump Ignored From His Own Book
In an ironic twist of fate that could only be rivaled by a pizza dough spinning out of control, Donald…
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