Hysterical Man Covered in Cheeto Dust Becomes President of the USA
Polly TickleIn an unprecedented twist that left the nation both amused and bewildered, Donald J. Trump has been elected President of…
Read MoreLocal Teen’s Pregnancy Excuse Kick-starts New Religion
Liv N. LargeIn a small town where nothing extraordinary ever happens, a local teen’s bizarre excuse for an unexpected pregnancy has ignited…
Read MoreMeta VR Headsets Have Hidden Lizard Mode for Mark Zuckerberg
DominickIn a revelation that’s sure to fuel countless conspiracy theories, reports have surfaced that Meta’s VR headsets come equipped with…
Read MoreElon Musk and Donald Trump to Escape to Mars if Kamala Wins
The 2024 election could be the most consequential in history—literally out of this world, if the latest rumors are to…
Read MoreUS Military Stocks Up on Sticks and Stones in Preparation for WW4
In an unprecedented move that has left military analysts scratching their heads, the United States Army has announced it is…
Read MoreRussian Military Requests Aid from Irish Fishermen as Ukrainian Forces Threaten Crimea
In a bizarre twist to the ongoing conflict between Russia and Ukraine, the beleaguered Russian military has reportedly turned to…
Read MoreIsrael Successfully Converts Millions of Jews to Zionism
In a calculated move that has sent shockwaves through Jewish communities worldwide, Israel has effectively replaced traditional Judaism with a…
Read MoreWe Want a Ceasefire, Says Country Supplying the Bombs
Washington, D.C. — In a move that has left the world both confused and amused, the United States has issued…
Read MoreElon Musk Reveals Plans to Host Cabaret Show on X
Chip ByteleyAustin, TX — Just when you thought the world of tech couldn’t get any weirder, Elon Musk has announced his…
Read MoreBomb Craters in Kursk Barely Noticeable Due to Russia’s Preexisting Infrastructure Woes
Kursk, Russia — In what might be the most anticlimactic invasion in recent history, Ukrainian forces found that their bombardment…
Read MoreElon Musk Reveals Twitter’s ‘X’ Stands For ‘Xenophobia’
Elon Musk, never one to shy away from controversy, has dropped a bombshell about his latest rebranding effort: Twitter’s transformation…
Read MoreIsrael to Allow Journalists from North Sentinel Island into Gaza
In a move that has left the global journalism community both baffled and outraged, Israel has announced that it will…
Read MoreUkraine Welcomes Growing Wave of Russian Refugees Fleeing Kremlin Control
A New Exodus: From Moscow to Mariupol In a twist of irony that even the most imaginative satirist could scarcely…
Read MoreUS Decides Rape is Acceptable Military Action
The United States has found a new benchmark for moral flexibility, with its decision to continue funneling military aid to…
Read MoreIsrael Expands West Bank Lebensraum Tactics to Target Christians
In a shocking escalation of its controversial policies, Israel has now set its sights on targeting Christian communities in the…
Read More